Life is Ironic

Life is so ironic sometimes. For example, I feel a lot more stressed about everything in general when the house is messy. I feel, I don't know, out of control I guess. And I do really enjoy cleaning. It calms me down and relaxes me. All these benefits but does it change how often I clean? No not really. The other hard part is I'm trying to learn that I'm not what I do. So if I don't get the dishes done it doesn't mean I'm a bad wife for example. So I'm trying to learn that while also getting things done, so I don't feel stressed, while I'm also lazy and haven't had time to do it, which remind me that I am not what I do. So the thing that makes me relax is also stressing me out. I'm tired just thinking about it! Thankfully Joe is not picky about the house, he actually thinks better when it's a little messy so that definitively helps. =D